Tuesday, November 24, 2009

What a mature and sensitive kid

We suddenly missed chloe very much these days.  I remember when ming and i were there this past summer: one afternoon ming was so tired (I guess he played basketball that early morning) so he wanted to nap.  He was playing with chloe but then he felt so tired that he just went to sleep.  Chloe went and grab a little chair/stool to use so she could reach a cd player on top of her tall dresser.  I asked her "What are you doing?" She replied "I am putting on lullaby for uncle ming."
She cracked me up.  So ming slept peacefully in lullaby music that afternoon.  :D

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Another depressing entry

I guess things have been crazy at the hospital.  Being in the clinic, although busy, i sometimes don't really know what is going on in the "outside world."  Lots of "pandemic plans" have been talked about.  One of them is the possibility of deploying staff to assist in the chaos in ER and on the wards.  Being 24 weeks pregnant, and working in a hospital is a difficult situations.  I was never afraid of helping out, i always wanted to be in the action or feel like i am contributing to the team.  But now... i still feel that way, only i have to step back and think for my unborn child.  It is such a hard situation to be in, having two kinds of feelings... It is something that only a woman will experience i guess: you cannot have it all, it's either your family or your career.  You gotta choose one.  Where I am standing right now, i gotta choose my family... And that makes me feel guilty and useless.  I don't want to be viewed as the prego women who had the easy way during this whole crisis.  I need to tough it out, so miki, just hang in there with me.